Returning to Thornfield

That Mr. Rochester… what a cruel, insensitive man he is! I cannot believe him – making me think that all along he was going after Blanche Ingram, and then turning around and proposing to me! The nerve of that man! I’ll have the reader know, while I did not agree with his toying of my love and showcasing false feelings for Ms. Ingram, I couldn’t help but fall in love with him. I had never intended to love him, but he made me love him; and I said yes to his proposal.

The proposal was quite some time ago, however; and since then much has occurred and much has changed. The most intriguing and hurtful occurrence was on the day of mine and Mr. Rochester’s wedding- while we were standing in front of the audience about to be wed, it was brought to everyone’s attention by a Mr. Mason, that Mr. Rochester couldn’t marry me because he was already married to another woman! I couldn’t believe it. I refused to believe it. But then Mr. Rochester confirmed it and I was informed that not only was he married, but he kept his wife locked in the third floor attic at Thornfield! As expected, I was devastated and beyond hurt that the man I thought I loved could lie to be and betray me. Soon after calling off the wedding I left Thornfield early in the morning and since then I have never gone back.

After leaving Thornfield, I quickly found myself without any of my personal items, I had no money, I had nowhere to stay, and no place to work. Fortunately, on a cold, rainy night I came across a house that so graciously accepted me into their homes and took care of me. The tenants of the home- Mary, Diana and St. John Rivers- were wonderfully hospitable and allowed me to stay with them as long as needed. While I resided at the Moor House, St. John was kind enough to help me regain my strength and it was then that I was able to find a teaching job in the village. After living at the Moor House for quite some time, it was brought to my attention that the Rivers were actually cousins of mine and that I had inherited 20,000 pounds from an Uncle I never knew about.

 In addition to receiving 20,000 pounds, I also received a marriage proposal from St. John! St. John requested that I marry him and go with him to India on a mission trip. However, I knew that if I had said yes to the proposal that our marriage would only be out of convenience and wouldn’t be out of love; therefore, I declined his proposal.

It is now just a few days after I rejected St. John’s proposal, and I am currently getting prepared to return to Thornfield Hall and to see Mr. Rochester. It was as if a voice was calling out my name and I knew that my heart wanted to return to Mr. Rochester.

To be continued from Thornfield Hall,
Jane
(Source: Jane Eyre chapters 17-36)